Law School has classes on many different aspects of the legal system (Contracts, Property, Civil Procedure to name a few)—but there’s one very important subject that they don’t have in the curriculum: Empathy.
I remember one case I had, years ago, where the opposing lawyer was a very clever man, and very litigious—but lacked any sense of empathy. He did a number of things in court that were within the bounds of the law, but just, and often manipulated people and situations to further his case.
He treated the case—which involved two children, (two and five years old)—like a chess game. He wanted to <em>win</em>, not for the sake of the people involved, but for his own sense of pride and ego.
Unfortunately, there are parts of the American legal system that reward this kind of behavior. Getting a reputation for being a tough litigator or always fighting can be a strong selling point for a lawyer; there are potential clients who believe that they want a lawyer who will go to battle for them—rather than someone who they trust to be looking after their best interests. Sometimes Courtrooms and Judges are the only way conflicts can be resolved but in truth that is much less of the time than not.
And this idea is perpetuated in the media. Even if they’re not <a href=”http://youtu.be/jvlEqAjg8aU?t=15s”>a ‘criminal lawyer’ like Saul Goodman from <em>Breaking Bad</em></a>—courtroom dramas like <em>To Kill A Mockingbird </em>and <em>Twelve Angry Men</em> depend on clever twisting and turning, or trapping people in lies and mistakes. Even when they’re well-intentioned, these legal plots depend on finding that ‘Aha!’ moment, rather than being empathetic to everyone involved. (Obviously, that makes for better drama, but it still pervades the public consciousness.)
This is one of the paradigms I’m trying to shift through the Consilium Process. When I help families restructure, I want to assist them in creating equitable and forward thinking solutions for their family as a whole. It’s not just about the thrill of trapping someone and getting to yell “Checkmate!”